I am so glad that I fell behind on The New Girl because I just got to spend almost 2 hours laughing so hard. I am embarrassed that the neighbors might have heard me, and thought I was having Fran Drescher over for dinner. I seriously CANNOT control my giggles when it comes to this show. Love me some Zooey.viaOne of the reasons? This monologue. Jess goes on a rant defending herself to Nick's girlfriend, the mean power suit wearing lawyer who doesn't like dessert. It's from episode 11, Jess & Julia, read more here. I hope it resonates with as much hilarity as I found. I can't find the video, but it is on demand!(yes, I am still laughing) "I brake for birds
I rock a lot of polka dots
I have touched glitter in the last 24 hours
I spend my entire day talking to children...
and I find it fundamentally strange that you’re
not a dessert person.
That’s just weird, and it freaks me out. I'm sorry I don't talk like Murphy Brown,
I hate your pantsuit
I wish it had ribbons on it or something to make it slightly cuter-
And that doesn't mean I'm not smart and tough and strong...
And I'm about to go pay this $800 fine and my checks have baby farm animals on them... bitch!"
OMG I seriously love this show too. You must watch the first 2 episodes...they are some of my fave.
ReplyDeleteNew Girl is one of my favorite shows! I love Zooey, but I love Schmidt too. Especially his birthday song and all the crap he does to make him have to put money in the Douchebag Jar. Priceless!
ReplyDeleteI love the douche bag jar.
DeleteI love Schmidt! He is so so so funny! When he was talking about his hair chut-en-ney, I was DYING!
ReplyDeleteI saw the first few, and then the Thanksgiving one, and the most recent two. I missed a couple, so I'll have to watch them soon. I didn't want to just like it because I love her.. The writing makes me laugh!
ReplyDeleteI love that show!!! And, as a night shift worker with an ever changing schedule, I can appreciate that each show can be watched alone. Last night I was howling in laughter!
ReplyDeleteBTW, she is hosting SNL this weekend!
Cheers,
W. :)
i love this show and zoey! this episode was pretty hilarious. i'm a big lizzy caplan fan too, and i wish she was playing a cooler character than she is.
ReplyDeleteWHAAT! Amazing, setting the DVR right now. I love her! Thanks for letting me know!
ReplyDeleteI know, when I first heard her voice I was like JANICE IAN! When she socked that dude in the face, I had to pause the show I was laughing so loud.
ReplyDeleteThis monologue is definitely my favorite of the show so far! I have a feeling that this will be the nice girls' rant for a long time!
ReplyDeleteThat was my absolute favorite part of that episode. I love Jess. And her style. And her positive ways. And what's not to live about Schmidt and the grouchy roommate who's name escapes me....
ReplyDeleteI stopped watching this show after 2 or 3 episodes. However, I feel like I wrote that monologue. Basically, I DO spend my days talking to children. Some of my nights, too. And basically I wake up with glitter in between my toes.
ReplyDeleteI know! I feel like the rant was written FOR me!
ReplyDeleteYou should catch up. Some of the more recent ones are delightful! And if this isn't a biographical rant about us... I don't know what is!
ReplyDeletelove love love
ReplyDeletemy favorite show! my husband likes it too!
ReplyDeletei borrowed the rant you typed up for my "favorite quotes" section on facebook--hope that's OK! :)